Monday, January 31, 2011

The Bachelor (01/31/2011)

Everything I know about dating, I learned from watching The Bachelor:

It's fun to let a boy buy you thousands of dollars worth of nice clothes, then wear flip flops to dinner.

I want to be a funeral director, so I can truthfully say to all my dates that guys are dying to be with me.

Guys give the most attention to hot psychos.
(ok, this isn't new information)

Girls are always shocked when boys pull away.

I do not cry more than any other chick on the planet.
(ok, this IS new information)

Women constantly crave feeling special. Men constantly crave feeling boobs.

The face-grabber smooch never fails to be genuine and romantic, no matter how many bitches you snog in one evening.

Saying "I'm falling for you" to a girl whose fiance died in a plane crash is a little mean.

Dates that are 80% crying are perfectly acceptable. 
Ask your therapist; he'll tell you it's healthy. 

Creepy = Sexy

I want my next relationship to have a televised exit interview.

This episode was all about chicks who cry a lot.
It's like it was made just for me.
Thank you, ABC <3


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