How suspicious ...

Boys constantly say they never understand what women are talking about ...

Until we say dudes are stupid and then all of a sudden they know what we mean.

~

words of encouragement

Someone told me once "Averill, you can do anything!"

I know it wasn't either of my parents, so
I'm gonna guess it was a dude I was sleeping with.

~

a wee birthday note

I would like to thank all of my friends who posted such sweet birthday wishes on my Facebook page yesterday and today.

To those of you who took the time: Thank you. I am sincerely touched.

To those of you who didn't: You can paypal me your apologies.

~

you know you're old when ...

You think #hashtag is a game you play when you're really really high.

~

celebrity asshats

Can't figure out why Lady Gaga doesn't wear an actual ass as a hat.

Seems appropriate, nu?

Maybe that's why. Gosh, fashion is so COMPLICATED.

~

cost/benefit analysis of breakfast

I HATE store-bought tomatoes. And cottage cheese.

And yet, I am having both for breakfast.  With a can of tuna.

I should've just had waffles; As long as Clive Owen is married, there will never be a dude good enough to torture myself like this for.

;)

~

bedtime snack attack

Couldn't fall asleep last night. Something ouchy jabbing me.

Freaked out, jumped out of bed squealing, thinking it was a HUGE BUG biting my boob.

Nope. Popcorn in the sports bra. So sexy.

:)